Category Archives: Success

SUCCESS, what does it mean to you?

Success is simply the feeling of satisfaction and happiness one gets from leading a particular way of life or carrying out a particular activity. The never give up attitude is very important.
Success can only be achieved through hard work and a little bit of opportunity.

It is very important for every individual to define their own concept of success rather than following someone else’s footsteps. We must analyze what makes us happy, what gives us contentment, and what motivates us. No one knows our needs better than us.

As humans are unique individuals Success differs according to people’s interests and goals.
“Is it money or status in society”, “Is it how things are done?”, “Is it what you get in return?”, “Is it in the number of things we can amass in our life?”

People focus on the final outcome, but the long winding journey toward the goal is what matters. We look at everything through the eyes of instant gratification. Stories of success are not created overnight. Achievement whether big or small demands efforts and sacrifices.

Winston Churchill quotes it as, “Success is stumbling from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm.”

Many of us give up on success and settle for mediocrity? It all has to do with lack of
determination, persistence, hard work and stepping out of your comfort zone.

Most people are not committed and they did not dare to make the decision to strive for what they want in life. Success will come to you only when you are fully committed and decided that you will go for it no matter what.

So what makes successful people successful? What do they do differently than ordinary people that lead them to live an amazing life?

Here is how you can be successful in life…

1. Set Goals & Believe in them

Goals gives you purpose, and they help you to guide your life.

Most successful people achieve their goals because they define them, and consider them as believable and achievable. Goals directs you towards success. Goals should be
SMART – Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic and Time bound. Be honest when analysing your goals and change them if the need arises. Break your large goals into smaller, more manageable tasks.

2. Be ready for taking up challenges

Life always throws challenges along the way. You can use it as a stepping stone or buckle
down under pressure. The choice is yours. We are most proud when we overcome adversity to accomplish something worthwhile.

3. Develop Confidence

No one is born a confident person. Confidence is developed through everyday interactions and experiences.

Limit your negative thoughts and beliefs and shift to positive thoughts, will help you gain confidence. Focus on all the reasons of why you will you’ll succeed. You need to have the confidence to move on and to turn failures into learning lessons.

4. Live a Disciplined Life

Discipline is the bridge between goals and accomplishment. Discipline ensures the smooth flow of life. It works automatically and leads to success. It can be developed and strengthened at any given time if one puts their your mind to it. Resist the urge to give into negative behaviours, instead focus on all of the positive attributes.

5. Always be on the move

Besides thinking big, you always have to be on the move. Be proactive and make things happen rather than waiting for things to happen.
Take action and make your dreams a reality. A lot of people want to be successful but they are not willing to take the action to make their dreams come true.
So commit to taking at least 5 small actions that will move you toward your goals each day. Success requires consistency. So be consistent and take action every day.

6. Never Give Up

The journey to success is tough and you will go through a lot of failures and setbacks. However, never let them get you down. People like Walt Disney, Colonel Sanders, Richard Branson, Michael Jordan, Jack Ma, etc, simply refused to quit when they failed.

Great people will never quit and they will never give up on their dreams. They will hold on and continue to work hard even when every other people tell them it is impossible.

7. Always expect positive things

After reading success stories from great people around the world, I found that successful people are always positive and they expect positive things to happen in the future.

Always think positive and always expect the best. It does not matter even if you are not successful right now, what matters most is where you would want to go and are you willing to work for it.

Set goals instead of New Year resolutions

There was a time in my life when every New Year’s Eve, I would set resolutions. They were mostly focused on my health: Lose weight, exercise more or change a bad habit.
Sound familiar?
The start of the New Year is a good time to think about what you want to accomplish in the coming months. Perhaps you have already committed to a New Year’s resolution, which is a good start.
What I realized is that my resolutions were focused more around what I should NOT be doing versus who I SHOULD strive to be. I usually found that by the second or third week of January, I had reverted back to my old habits and my resolutions were forgotten or at least ignored.
We don’t usually plan out how to sustain that resolution for a whole year. Perhaps that’s why only 8 percent of people who make a New Year’s resolution actually keep it.
I decided that I needed to get a system in place to assist me in developing my goals and keeping them in the forefront of my mind so that I can accomplish them. So, I found a system that appealed to me and determined that for one year I would stay committed to it.
Goals, not resolutions, are the key to long-term growth and success. And the secret to setting compelling goals is knowing why it is you want what you want – finding purpose and meaning in your goals.

It was an amazing process to go through the first time and a task I look forward to doing each year. The ability to sit back and ask yourself, in every aspect of your life, what you want to keep the same and what you wish to do differently is so freeing. To be able to put my goals down on paper and then have a system in place to keep them as a focus in my life on a regular basis is absolutely the key to success.

Key to achieving anything you want

One key to accomplishing anything is to decide to do it, and then to schedule it. You will not take action on an idea until you make it real by writing it down and putting it on your calendar. You will not change anything until you take action. Because we’re holistic people, ideas, plans and actions work together. A goal that is only written down is a resolution — an idea. An idea that is written and scheduled is a goal. Placing action steps onto your planner or diary will motivate you to move forward.

Another key creating compelling goals will help you stay motivated, even when times get tough. What resolutions are you considering? Whether it’s to grow professionally or get in a better state of health, you’ll have a hard time succeeding unless you create a truly compelling goal. And the secret to setting compelling goals is knowing why it is you want what you want – finding purpose and meaning in your goals.

Start now and keep going

Accomplishing goals and achieving purpose is done in a series of small steps. You can take the next small step. Step out in faith, with determination to keep going, one step at a time.
The more you take action on your goals, the more momentum you build, and your freelance road trip becomes exciting. You build competence and confidence with each accomplishment, no matter how small. Each step and goal achieved are mile markers on your road to achieving your ultimate purpose.

Your Action Step

Choose one goal, and schedule 1-3 small action steps you can take on it this week. This will get you moving forward. Schedule more steps for next week, and every week until you reach your goal.
There are many tips for keeping New Year’s resolutions, but the main one is this: Don’t simply tie goals to the new year because everyone else is doing it. Real change comes when you know your outcome and commit to making your goals a reality. Learning to set and achieve goals is a great habit that few truly master in their lifetimes. Get everything you want this year, and every year, by deciding to set and achieve goals that truly matter to you.

The trap of negative self-talk

Are you caught up in negative self-talk? Do you have a relentless inner self or critical parent who taunts you at every turn?

Usually, this aspect of your mind develops as a young child in response to messages you receive from those around you. If you had a critical parent, you may have internalized his or her negative messages about you, continued to repeat them to yourself as a child, and now carry on in the same way as an adult.

Even if your parents were loving, no parent is perfect and few marriages are without conflict. Young children readily absorb the world around them, and usually take a parent’s expectations or moments of frustration seriously. So you may still have picked up and internalized negative messages about yourself.

As insidious as these critical beliefs can be, sometimes they run like background noise in your mind, so you don’t consciously or fully hear them. Nevertheless, they control your life. They impact your moods, diminish your feelings of self-worth, and obstruct your ability to accomplish your dreams.

You would never say those kinds of critical things to a friend, would you? And if you heard a friend saying such negativities to herself, you would rush to reassure her of her value.

Now it’s time to reassure yourself of your own value.

15 Negative Self-Beliefs to Drop Right Now

Here are some of the most comment negative phases that haunt many people, and some tips on how to think about them and respond in a positive way.

Would you like to shift your negative self-talk to positive self-talk? The first step is to become mindful of your self-talk.

Once you are aware of your negative stories, you can create affirmations and antidotes to offset each one, and gradually feel happier each day.

1. I’m unlovable

The question is : Do you love yourself?

Friends, family, and lovers come and go. If you depend on others to feel loved, you’ll often feel disappointed, unloved, or unlovable.

Real love is a feeling that arises within, and it begins with self-respect, self-love, and a willingness to open your heart. Healthy self-love isn’t a nauseating, self-absorbed emotion, but rather a range of positive qualities and abilities that combine to make a healthy, whole person.

If you want to feel lovable, start loving yourself.

2. I can’t trust anyone

I have had many disappointments in my life, which have made it difficult for me to trust others.

Focus on learning to trust yourself more. It helps me make wiser choices. For example, I’m less likely to involve myself with people who are undeserving of my trust. I may make mistakes again when it comes to trusting, but I’ll probably catch it sooner. It’s all part of my learning process here on this earth.

Start by learning to trust yourself. Listen to your inner voice and act on its guidance. Follow your gut instincts. Be clear on what’s true for you.

When you trust yourself, you’ll find it easier to trust others, those who are trustworthy.

3. Other people get more

Some people are magnetic and seem to get whatever it is that they want in life. Or maybe they just have good karma.

But instead of focusing on them, focus on what it is you want in life. Outline the steps you need to take to get there. Then do your best.

Also, ask yourself, is it really the person with the most marbles that wins? Maybe it’s not about more, but feeling grateful for what you already have.

When you feel grateful for all the goodness in your life, you’ll no longer worry about whether others get more.

4. I’m invisible

Feeling invisible often means feeling unseen and left out. As a result, you go further and further into your shell.

Instead, dare to be vulnerable and come out of hiding. Start to reach out and make connections with people who uplift you and make you feel seen. Just start with one person. If you don’t feel seen by that person, move on to the next.

Above all, make sure you see yourself. Make a list of your qualities and accomplishments. Everyday, write down something or several things you appreciate yourself for.

When you feel good about yourself, you shine. People will definitely see you.

5. No one understands me

Have you heard this quote from Dr. Stephen R. Covey?

“Seek first to understand, then to be understood.”

He says that it’s the most important principle he’s learned in the field of interpersonal relationships.

If you feel like no one understands you, try to understand them first. Gradually, see if it makes a difference in your relationships.

Also, hone up on your communication skills so you’re clearly communicating your wishes, needs and who you truly are. Ask people to repeat back what you’ve told them, so you can ascertain whether they you understand you or not. Learn Non-Violent Communication techniques.

6. No one cares

What would it look like if someone cared?

Look back on your life, start with the last few months, and identify times when people showed or expressed care. Keep a list of times when someone does something nice for you. It could be as simple as bringing you a cup of tea or opening a door for you. A list like this will remind you that you live in a world where most people care.

If your friends are so self-absorbed they don’t express care towards you, it’s probably time to move on. Build a support system of people who do care, one by one. Join a support group.

7. I’m ugly

It’s hard to escape this one given the way advertising companies do all they can to promote a singular image of beauty. No wonder eating disorders run rampant in the modern world. People with a negative body image are more like to develop an eating disorder, which brings serious suffering.

Consider what you can do to develop a positive body image, whatever your size, shape, or looks.

And remember, beauty is more than outer appearances. When you feel good about yourself, you radiate a positive energy that no one can resist.

8. I’m broken

So many people struggle with profound childhood wounds and traumas that have led them to addictions, self-destructive behaviors, and co-dependent relationships. If you feel broken, you’re not alone.

But you can heal, and there is so much more knowledge, awareness, and help available these days.

9. I’m stupid

Maybe you had a learning disability as a child. Maybe there was a certain topic in school you just couldn’t grasp. And maybe it’s a lie one of your parents told you when they felt impatient or angry. None of this means you’re stupid.

You may not have a genius IQ, neither do I, but there are many different forms of intelligence.

In addition to brain power, there’s emotional intelligence. There’s know-how, handiness, and being able to get along in this world. There’s creative intelligence, the ability to use your imagination, come up with original ideas, or express your visions through artistic mediums.

You likely have at least one form of intelligence. Which is it? Own it! Celebrate it!

10. I’m not good enough

If you grew up in a dysfunctional family, you may have tried to fix your parent’s problems either by trying to be better in some way, or acting out to capture his or her attention.

You probably hoped that if you could just make your parent or parents happy, they would love you, spend time with you, and take care of you. But no matter what you did, you could not fix their problems. So you began to believe you’re not good enough.

This may have been your way of surviving in a dysfunctional family, but it’s not a belief you need to continue to hold onto. You’ll never be able to fix other people’s problems, but that doesn’t mean you’re not good enough.

11. I’m not safe

Sometimes this belief emerges when wounding occurred very early — in the womb or very soon after birth. Repeated shocks can cause a fragile self to fragment and runaway back to the spirit world, which feels safer than the physical body and physical world.

As a result, you may not have been able to complete the first developmental task of embodiment. Embodiment involves developing a strong sense of self that is securely attached to the body, as well as a strong energetic boundary to protect yourself from future disturbances.

This feeling and belief can also result when you live in an environment where there’s emotional or physical abuse. Naturally, you don’t feel safe and may carry that belief into your adulthood.

If the wounding occurred early, you could do embodiment practices – actually feeling your physical body and realizing you are safe in this moment. If you suffered from physical or emotional trauma, you could start therapy and explore ways that you could begin to feel safe.

Safety is a prerequisite for all other personal growth.

12. I’m alone

If one or both of your parents were emotionally absent, you may feel all alone in the world.

So as an adult, you may feel like you can do it all on your own, and you don’t need anyone else; thus isolating yourself. Or you may feel like no one will help you. You might have chosen a partner who is emotionally distant because that’s what you’re accustomed to.

As much as you feel alone, you may resist connection even though you desperately want and need it.

You’ll have to push through and begin to develop your social skills, reach out to others and establish connections. You can start small and be gentle with yourself as you venture out.

Reflect on what a genuine sense of connection feels like to you, and then try to establish that with others.

13. I don’t belong

This is another believe that can emerge when wounding occurred very early – in the womb or very soon after birth. You may feel like you don’t belong in your family, with other people, or on this earth. This quote from Brene Brown speaks directly to this belief:

“Stop walking through the world looking for confirmation that you don’t belong. You will always find it because you’ve made that your mission. Stop scouring people’s faces for evidence that you’re not enough. You will always find it because you’ve made that your goal. True belonging and self-worth are not goods; we don’t negotiate their value with the world. The truth about who we are lives in our hearts. Our call to courage is to protect our wild heart against constant evaluation, especially our own. No one belongs here more than you.”

Keep telling yourself: “No one belongs here more than me.”

14. I don’t matter

“Nature never repeats herself, and the possibilities of one human soul will never be found in another.” – Elizabeth Cady Stanton

You’re a unique soul, so of course you matter. You were born for a reason. You have something to offer to this world.

It doesn’t have to be epic. It can be as simple as sharing a smile with those you encounter as you go about your day, giving someone your full attention, or being a good parent.

15. I’m not valuable

Recognizing your value means owning your qualities, talents, and abilities. So list them out. Return to the list whenever you feel you’re not valuable. Write down compliments you receive, and revisit them whoever you need a boost.

Your mind is the architect of your life. Every thought colors your experience and slants it this way or that way. You plant karmic seeds with your thoughts, and they become the unconscious patterns of your mind. You’ll never have a happy, satisfied, peaceful life if you ascribe to negative beliefs about yourself.

Your Mind Is Powerful

There’s no need to judge your self-critical thoughts or to judge yourself harshly for having thoughts like these. Just notice them when they appear and chose a different thought, a positive one.

Don’t let negative self-talk destroy your self-worth and confidence. Decide to be aware of your mind and the way you speak to yourself. Turn around the negative stories, one by one. You’ll feel happier, stronger, and more confident each and every day.

The pursuit of Happiness

All of us affirm to want to be happy, yet the pursuit of happiness never reaches the top of our to-do lists. as our lives are busy, caring for our children and parents, holding on to our jobs, working to pay the bills, the EMI’s and to see the smooth functioning of our families. We are “happy” simply to complete our tasks for the day. Have we stopped and asked ourselves
whether these tasks are making us really happy?

But what is Happiness?

Happiness is defined as – the state of being happy.

 

Happiness is a state and not a trait. Happiness is a skill you can learn and practice the rest of your life. Whether you drive from happiness, pursuit happiness, or simply grow happiness right under your feet, you can draw from many sources to help you through your journey in life.

Happiness is satisfaction with one’s self. It is associated with self-confidence, self-esteem, and the feeling of content.

In general, it means that you are pleased with yourself and your choices, and with the person that you are.

A few Steps to Attract Happiness

 

1. Be Content

Some people are magnetic and seem to get whatever it is that they want in life. Instead of focusing on them, focus on what it is you want in life. Transform these activated feelings into deactivated feelings such as calmness and contentment. These feelings are healthier and also easier to sustain. Outline the steps you need to take to get there. Then do your best.

2. Gratitude

Be grateful for what you already have i.e the present; from the tiniest things of beauty to the grandest of our blessings – and in so doing, to take nothing for granted. Focus your attention on the opportunities that are always available and acknowledge, that life is a gift, even in the most challenging times. Life gives us opportunities to learn and grow, and to extend ourselves with care and compassion to others.
When you feel grateful for all the goodness in your life, you’ll no longer worry about whether others get more.

3. Love yourself

Ask yourself “Do I love myself? You deserve to be loved not only by those around you but by the most important person in your life — YOU.

Real love is a feeling that arises within, and it begins with self-respect, self-love, and a illingness to open your heart. Healthy self-love is about getting in touch with ourselves, our well-being and our happiness.

If you want to feel lovable, start loving yourself.

4. Live in the Present

As the saying goes “To err is human”
Everyone makes mistakes. So stop thinking about your past mistakes. Nobody is perfect. Stop blaming yourself or feeling guilty for all the bad decisions you have taken in life. Also stop worrying about your future. Live in the present and cherish every moment. Don’t let the good times go unnoticed.

You can’t change the things you have done in the past but you can control your future. Look at it as a learning experience and believe in your ability to change.

5. Be Thankful

Be thankful that you wake up every morning. Not many people are lucky to see a new day. Be thankful for the air you breathe, water you drink, the food you eat. You may not be aware that many people out there would like to be in your shoes.

Remember all your past moments and decisions that brought happiness and rejoice in them. Be thankful to God for bestowing such joyous moments.

6. Develop Positive Thoughts

Your thoughts build your reality. Positive thoughts creates real value in your life and helps you build skills that last much longer than a smile.

Positive thoughts attract positive things in life and negative thoughts attract similar experiences. The only way to experience happiness is to feel good about all that you have. Surround Yourself with Positive People. Steer clear from people who indulge in negative talks or de-motivate you.